A Letter to My Cousin Paige

It is midnight. Tired. Eyes drooping. Yet i want to write a quick letter off to my cousin Paige.  I am not sure of the reason why I write this, or even put it on here. Maybe to answer some of her questions, maybe to get some thoughts onto paper, i do not know. But I feel that I should.

Sister Newman,
I love calling you that! You are my sister, my cousin, part of my family and I love you. I am so very proud of you. I think about you often and find myself thinking about you and the work that you do in Taiwan. You are blessed everyday by our God. He is so good. Many things we may not understand. But if there is one thing that you take away from this letter, know that I love Him and He loves us.

I am getting ready to embark on a new journey. It's like all the nights we spent out on the porch talking of the future. Remember how we spoke of coming to BYU? Getting married? Etc.  You, me, Blake, David, Kathryn, Austin, and Kelly? All of us trampling around and being the "biggest" in town!! Haha. Those days seem far away, and yet they are close to my heart. I miss them. And I miss you.  I am so grateful for those experiences.

Continuing in my own life and journey has been full of trials which have led to outpourings of the spirit. I feel a joy and happiness that is new and exciting. Paige, life is wonderful. I am sure that you are noticing that in Taiwan. All these trials and hard moments are but that.... moments. God never ceases to amaze me by blessing me abundantly. I remember from my mission to Paraguay many days of straight walking... and walking in Paraguay was not always a picnic :) Walking and talking, yet it seemed that nobody seemed to care nor give us the time of day. My companion and I have things thrown at us, spit at us, even trying to hit us.

The Lord gave me some of the greatest learning experiences during that time. I learned to trust in Him. He is the great Master of all things. He knows everyone; their thoughts and desires of their hearts. I learned that if we remain true, that is if we do what we can with the available time and resources then He will provide a way to accomplish his work. It may not come in our timetable. In my case I did not have anything going for four, yeah, four weeks. It was rough. We worked our tails off and did everything we could. By week 3 we decided to be happy no matter what and smile. As we did we felt better. We realized who we were and that this work was larger than just myself or my companion, but it was God's holy work of bringing others to him. That was something worth fighting for (figuratively not physically with punches :) ). He taught me to love people. I thought i knew how to do that before..... I was pretty naïve about that. My faith expanded, hope, charity, indeed all of me. That's what happens when we are on the Lord's errand.

I have even learned about this and grown as i've been home. And it has grown exponentially as I have dated Dana. Throughout the course of our friendship/relationship/engagement I have had an increase in my faith, my hope, my desires to serve God and others, desire to be my best self, to have the spirit with me, to be even as God, because of her. It's incredible. I learned many of these things with my mission companions, and now it is being increased by my angel from God, Dana. I love her. I would do anything for her. I pray to always be worthy of her. I worked so hard on my mission because I wanted to be worthy to be with God again and to be worthy of her.

Confront new challenges with faith! Faith has taken on a deeper meaning in the past year or so. I understand it more than before.... yet I still have a ways to go :) Do not be discouraged by trials with companions. Don't be stressed out if something is not right. I got up-tight and it put strain on some companions. Just take a deep breath, realize that not anyone, you nor they, are perfect. Of course the issue must be resolved and talked about, please do that. But there is a deeper principle here. The fact that faith leads to repentance. Have the faith to talk with your companion. The faith to openly communicate, to be of "one mind" and "one heart". I have learned with Dana that an open communication establishes trust and unity. I did not know what exactly that meant in marriage, nor if I ever could do that, till now. And it is bliss. I feel more love towards her than ever before because she knows me. She knows my thoughts and heart. My weaknesses and strengths. And she helps me. And I her. That faith will lead to action, or a change, to be more like the Savior. The is the essence of repentance: changing to be more like God and Jesus Christ. How amazing!!!!

So my dear cousin, go at it head on. I am so happy to read your letters every week. The gospel is true no matter where you are. Tell the wonderful people of Taiwan about the Savior. Express your love for him and they will feel something new arise in them. God loves them Paige. He loves everyone from the beggar  the drunk, the sinner to the president, the priest, the intellect. He loves them. He cares for them. He has sent you to be an angel for Him, to bear them up. Indeed, we are all to do that. I pray that we may rise up, and see that life is wonderful and coming to Christ is indeed worth it. Every moment.

Paige, know that i know that God lives. He is our Father. His Son is Jesus Christ. He is the Savior of ALL mankind. Through His atonement we can be changed to be even as He is. I want to be like Him. I try everyday. He helps me. Dana helps me.

Know that we love you so much. Dana and I will send pictures of our wedding in November. We are praying for you and for you to help those who God puts in your way. (perhaps in another letter I'll write about the spirit and just going forth) (A carrot for next time ;) ).

I love you. Thanks for representing our family. You will be forever blessed with your family. Thanks for influencing my life. You're the greatest!!

With love and prayers,
Your cousin,
Cam

- End of letter. I still do not know why I wrote it on this blog. I have not rewritten it with exception of a word here or there. It is really 12:40am now and the grammar is probably terrible. I hope that some of you may read this and find truths in it for your life and understand a little bit more why life is great. Thanks for reading. Gnight!

ps. Paige is a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Rising From The Ashes

Life is about rising up. Raising our sights. Raising limits, expectations, goals, dreams... Though one of the least known, or understood, is that of rising up from disappointment, disaster, failure, and defeat. In essence, rising from the ashes.

Yesterday morning, Saturday, I was able to watch the broadcast of the groundbreaking of the new Provo City Center Temple. For those of you that don't the background of this story I will summarize. The Provo Tabernacle has stood for over 100 years in the heart of Provo. It has served many functions over the years. Yet in 2010 the interior and roof were burnt to the ground by a sudden fire. The church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) did not announce for over a year what exactly it was going to do with the site. Until general conference in October of 2011 when President Monson announced it would reconstruct it and convert it into a Temple.

"Temples are literally houses of the Lord. They are holy

places of worship where the Lord may visit. Only the home

can compare with temples in sacredness." 

A temple is a very holy place. It is a place where I feel at peace. I can feel close to Heavenly Father. It is a place really where "heaven touches earth." It is a place where a family can be united eternally, and not "just till death do us part." It is a place where I love to be. 

So yesterday when I was watching the broadcast yesterday I felt great. I was so happy to be apart of the groundbreaking of this new temple, a place that is so dear to me. After the ceremony Elder Holland invited all to come and use the shovels to move the dirt take pictures and what not. I looked at my friend Abe and we knew. We drove down as quick as possible to get in and we did. We took pictures, saw Elder Holland and what not. But the thing that struck me the most was the burnt-out building I laid my hand on. At the moment it was there in ashes, but was destined to be something even more, re-built for an even great purpose: To be a House of the Lord. Out of ITS ashes was rising something even more magnificent. 

All weekend I have reflected upon that moment when I laid my hand on the temple, for shortly afterward a group of children came to place their hands on it as well. I smiled at them. I began to think about life. About the joys and sorrows of it. Many times in my life I feel defeated, tired, weakened, full of error etc. It is hard. Like life metaphorically speaking turns to ashes. 

Though with the Master Architect Jesus we can be rebuilt from our ashes to BECOME something greater. We can BE who we are ment to be. We can transform our hearts and souls. And you wanna know a secret? That is the way life was created to be!! To learn and grow. To go through our days of fire and refinement in order to become the person, man or women, who our Creator knew (and still knows) we can be. I am so grateful that we have a Savior to help us. I could not go forward with out Him.  

Just as the ashes of the tabernacle are being raised to something new, so to can our lives be daily. By our daily interactions we can be taken to a higher plane and become someone better; closer to who we are supposed to be. I love it. This is why life is great because we can rise from the ashes!